Growing up Mercer
by WriterT
Summary: Abby Mercer is the youngest of the Mercer bunch and Bobby's biological sister. But when there biological mother threatens life as Abby knows it will she turn to her brother's for help or will she be forced to watch her life crumble away?
1. Chapter 1

**Me again! After some request I decided to pick the story back up. But because it had been _months_ since the last time I had worked on it, I decided to change some things about it. Hope you all enjoy! **

* * *

Handcuffs suck. My wrists are sore as hell and I can just tell that my skin is going to be red and raw tomorrow. I'm already in the fucking cell, what the hell do I need chains for anyways? I try shifting and almost manage to get them touching the cold metal bench I'm sitting on, but it's hopeless. And as if that's not enough, all I can smell is piss and vomit in this dog kennel sized holding cell and right now, I would be grateful to only have to smell the vomit. The fluorescent lights in the ceiling are starting to burn my eyes, and I close them and lean my head back. For two fucking endless hours I've been holed up in this cell and I am starting to figure out that Ma is probably trying to prove a point. Lesson learned.

"Hey, next time I agree do you a favor remind me to kick your ass."

"Fuck off."

"Jesus Christ, what is this fucking Pineapple Express? Packin' eight God damn grams. Fuck. I didn't realize my little sister was such a burnout. "

I would've liked to tell Jack to chill out, but I felt that perhaps his anger was understandably justified.

* * *

I should've realized my night was going to hell in a hand basket when I couldn't find the small bag of pot I forked fifty five bucks over for, just five hours ago at the end of the school day. It probably wasn't even the 'golden grams' bag of weed the pusher promised either. Just my luck to spend all my cash on a small shitty ass bag of grass that wasn't even good quality and on top of that, lose it. I searched around my room tearing through everything.

"Abby!"

Angel's yell rudely broke into my frantic searching. My bedroom door swung open only stopping when it crashed hard into me.

"Ow! You dumbass!" I grabbed my elbow, holding it tenderly.

"Girl, watch your mouth. " Angel's said half heartedly as his big head peeked through my door and an annoyingly big fake smile was plastered on his face.

"What do you want?" I snapped, annoyed by being hit and the complete disregard that my brother's usually had for my privacy.

"Bitchy bitchy, settle down princess," he mumbled and chuckled at the annoyed glare I sent him "I was just headin' out for the night and I was seeing if your sorry ass needed a ride anywhere."

I eyed him suspiciously, it was so uncharacteristic of Angel to _offer _to give me a ride anywhere. Rarely, if ever, did one of my brothers give me a ride without being made to by Ma or needing a favor in return. With Angel it was usually a mixture of the two with a heavy emphasis on the latter.

"And maybe…15 bucks for gas." Angel tacked on after a moment of silence.

"I knew it! Seeing if I needed a ride. My ass you were." I shook my head. I bet Angel was the only hustler in Detroit who had to go to his little sister for gas money.

Although I really needed a ride I knew there was no way that Angel was going to drop me off at the house I was set on attending. Alex Garcia didn't exactly have the reputation that my brother's approved of. I was pretty sure Angel would seal my fate for another boring night at home if I asked him to drop me off there. Besides I didn't even have my damn weed yet.

At the thought of weed I reflexively raked my eyes across my floor. A small green bag caught my eye. Hidden under a pair of jeans that had been kicked under my bed, the bag barely peeked out from under the back pocket. I was relieved but also a bit frustrated at my carelessness. Why hadn't I checked the jeans that I had worn home from school? Of course it would be in-

"Hello?" Angel muttered, waving his hands in front of him and grabbing my attention. "You with me?"

"What? No." I said distractedly, "I um, I don't need a ride."

"Whatever." He said, annoyed that he would now have to go try to get his money from Jack. He waved his hand dismissively and pulled the door shut behind him as he left.

I waited until I heard Angel's 'Hey fairy!' before I grabbed the weed and stashed into the front pocket of my jeans. I had only really smoked twice before, both times being with Jack, before now. Although I would never admit it I had actually been nervous while I was buying today. But Alex's house was the place to be tonight and there was no way I was going to have fun without some weed of my own.

Now, I just needed to figure out how I was going to get there at all. I saw Angel's headlights pull out of the drive and decided that I would try Jack.

* * *

I could hear the strum of Jack's guitar as I lightly knocked on the door and pushed it open. "Jack?"

"_Abby_?" he echoed mockingly.

I walked into his room and sat by his feet at the end of his bed. "What's up?" I asked lightly, doing my best to seem interested in his guitar and not my own agenda. He, on the other hand, ignored me and focused only on his guitar. His hands plucked aimlessly at the strings. "Anything cool?"

He momentarily ignored me. "No, what do you want?" He asked, finally looking up. The hand that wasn't strumming his guitar floated up to his lips, his fingers wrapped around a cig that he inhaled deeply.

I wrinkled my nose at the cig. "Well, I just need a ride." I said simply. If he wasn't going to beat around the bush then I wasn't going to either.

Apparently Jack didn't feel the same way. "Don't bullshit me. Where to?"

"I'm not bullshitting you." I said defensively. Maybe Jack wasn't my best bet after all. "Alex Garcia's house," he looked at me skeptically so I continued hurriedly, "just a couple of people, nothing serious. Maybe have a beer or two. No big deal or anything. Besides it's Friday night and I don't have anything else to do _all _weekend." I threw the last part in as a stab at his sympathies. Unfortunately, he didn't bite.

He took another long drag. "No."

"What, that's all?" I said incredulously. "You can't just say no! Hell, even fucking Bobby would give me a reason why. C'mon don't be an asshole, it's not a big deal."

"Why didn't you get a ride from Angel?" he asked as he exhaled the smoke.

I rolled my eyes dramatically. "Whatever Jack, no way was he going to drop me off at Alex's. Cut me a break. Why can't you give me a ride?"

"It's not that I _can't_ give you a ride" Jack said, taking his sweet time as well as another drag. "It's just that it wouldn't be right. Morally, I mean. If you knew Angel wouldn't drop you off there then why would you ask me?"

He was shitting me right? _Morals,_ really? I stood up and turned to face him. "Don't go all fucking righteous on me Jack. You know you've spent plenty of time at that house and nothing shady goes on. C'mon just give me a ride. Do it as a favor, I will even owe you one for God sakes. Please just give me a ride, please?" I stood in front of him ready to stomp out of his room the second he started to mouth the word 'no'.

"Fine."

"You will?"

His cig had burnt out and he threw the stub out the open window. "Yeah, but you owe me one then, right?"

"Yeah, sure whatever Jack. Ten minutes sound good?"

* * *

I gave Ma a kiss on the cheek, trying to hurry out to Jack who was grudgingly waiting in the mini-van. "I will be back tomorrow morning, okay Ma?"

She held me at arm's length by my shoulders. "Honey, you know Bobby is coming home tonight right?" She continued before I could say anything, "I still want you to do what you want, but he does like to see you when he gets home." She said softly.

I couldn't help but feel a little bit guilty about what Ma said. She had a way of appealing to your sympathies, but I wasn't going to just cancel my plans because the almighty Bobby frickin' Mercer had decided to grace us with his presence. "I know, and I will be home tomorrow morning. Besides, he's probably just going to want to sleep when he gets home."

She looked at me but I couldn't figure out what she was seeing. Taking my chin in her hand, she kissed my forehead. "Be safe baby, you know I love you." I nodded my head and she gave me a light push to the door. "Wear your seatbelt!" She said as I opened the door. "Make sure your brother does too!"

I slid out the door nodding my head. "Okay, Ma."

* * *

"Yeah, you're one to talk!" I told Jack sharply "The last day Bobby was home you spent all day in your room crying over your guitar." I may have exaggerated that a little but it got a satisfying rise out of Jack. Besides, who was he to criticize the way I lived; like he's so much wiser.

"Oh, bullshit! At least I'm home the night he comes back!" Jack pointed an accusing finger at me. "Not going to some party to get doped up and drunk! We'll all enjoy _that_ tomorrow!" he finished sarcastically.

"Fuck you Jack, you know-"

We both ended up trying to yell over the other, more or less just arguing because it was more interesting than sitting quietly. Neither one of us closed our mouths until the red and blue lights started flashing.

"Shit!" Jack banged his hands on the wheel. "I didn't even fucking do anything!" He mumbled reflexively.

"Maybe they're pulling you over for being a jackass." I said absently as I wondered why the hell the officer would really feel the need to pull Jack over. I couldn't remember him blowing a red light or rolling through a stop sign. We were both wearing our seat belts. The two of us were more worried about yelling louder than the other to focus on the driving. Slowly the officer pulled up behind us and stepped out of the car.

"Hands where I can see them, both of you!" The officer yelled through Jack's open window as he approached. We threw our hands on the dash. He stopped outside the van and flipped a small pad of paper out. "Sir, do you know why I pulled you over tonight?"

Jack looked nervous, he had done a complete 180 from who he was a minute ago. He never really liked confrontation with adults and especially not confrontation from adults with authority. Jack kept his head down and his eyes low and shook his head.

"Sir, you were going forty-five in a thirty and blew through a yellow light." My eyebrows scrunched together as I tried to remember the part from my Driver's Ed. class where they mentioned that going through yellow lights was illegal. The officer squatted down so his elbows were resting on Jack's window. He peered through at me and when Jack didn't respond the officer said, "Sir?"

I looked over at Jack. He was starting to lock up, I could tell. His eyes glazed over, his lips were pursed tight, and his body had gone rigid. I nudged him with my elbow, "Jack say something!" I hissed with a definite panic in my voice. I hated to see Jack lose himself in his own world. "Jack!"

Jack's peculiar behavior must have clued the officer into thinking that Jack was doing something other than speeding. "Sir, Miss, I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the vehicle." He stood up and opened Jack's door.

I looked over at Jack. He nodded his head reassuringly before unbuckling his seatbelt and stepping out.

I met him on the other side of the van.

"I'm just going to need you both to turn around. Hands up on the car and spread your feet." The officer said, waving his flashlight at the van as if we were unsure about what he meant. "Let's go."

The officer patted down Jack first and only found his cigarettes which he confiscated. Next, he started on me. Running his hands through my hair, around my arms, into my sweatshirt pockets, and then-

He grabbed something from my jeans pocket. "Miss what is this?" he asked. In one quick motion, he held the bag in front of my face, the realization hitting me hard. My heart increased rapidly and my stomach dropped to the ground. My mouth dried up and I could feel the weight of my tongue press against the roof of my mouth. My legs felt weak and I thought I was going to be sick.

I tried to push all my feeling aside and appear confident. "Oregano." I said, shrugging my shoulders. If I was going to go down I was going to go down like a Mercer. Fighting and taking names till the end. Or at least denying everything and trying my hardest to look tough.

"I'm going to have to ask you two to turn against the car and put your hands behind your head."

* * *

Three hours and some odd minutes later found us sitting in a Detroit juvenile detention center holding cell. I was scared to death and doing my best not to show it. My thoughts raced faster than I could keep up. _Juvie, jail, Ma, weed_. My knee bounced furiously. I knew a guy from school who, on his eighteenth birthday, got caught with an ounce of weed and spent three months in jail. I couldn't survive jail! I was only fifteen. I could barely take sitting in school for seven hours, let alone sit in jail.

On the other hand, jail sounded more appealing than the thought of facing Ma. The heart shattering look of disappointment that would surely well up in her kind eyes. The way her mouth would fall just right so that a small frown curved her lips. Her hands would be folded and her fingers twisted together resting somberly in front of her.

I let my head fall back and took a deep sigh.

"Thinking about Ma?" Jack asked quietly. He stood up and stretched out his legs. His long hair fell in his face as he let his head drop. "Me too."

* * *

**Sooooo?**


	2. Chapter 2

**Huge thanks to my Beta TheImmortalChaplin, you rock!**

**Thanks to everyone who stuck with it despite the changes!**

**Hope you enjoy! **

**:)**

* * *

I found Ma's house pretty early in life. I was eight and had just been released from the hospital after a four day stay for dehydration, malnutrition, and a broken right arm. My Mom and her boyfriend at the time up and left me after eight years of mounting drug abuse and neglect. I suppose I could've fended pretty well independently if I hadn't climbed on the counter for cereal on the first day they left. Predictably, I slipped off and landed, twisting my right arm. It was just around three days before my grade school issued a "wellness check". They found me with a mangled arm, blacked out on the kitchen floor, and laying in a pool of Lucky Charms.

Eventually I ended up on Ma's door step. She hadn't ever taken a girl in before. Social services was pretty adamant on giving her the boys that no one else wanted, seeing as she had a knack for turning them into somewhat respectable citizens. That's how she ended up with Bobby, Jeremiah, Angel, and Jack, the roughest of the bunch. So when I pathetically moped up to her door, clad in nothing but torn and faded jeans, a ratty sweatshirt, and a bright pink cast, it threw her for a whirl in more ways than one.

"Bobby's...sister?" She asked in disbelief. I remembered how shocked I was by the same idea. How did I have a brother? My mom was young now, how could she have had a son that was more a man than a boy?

Apparently, when Bobby was twelve he already had half a dozen stints in juvie under his belt. So the seventh time he got arrested, his parents just gave him up, deciding he was too much work. It's not like they put a lot of effort into him anyways, it probably wasn't too grueling of a decision for them. Didn't even say bye to him or nothing, just signed the papers and left his sorry ass for the City of Detroit to handle. Two years later I was born; same mom, different dad, but still the same assholes. They stuck around until I was eight, and their need for drug money outweighed their want to have me around. I just woke up one morning and they were gone. Nothing but the scent of their last bowl remained in the house.

Now, seven years older and four brothers later, I found myself in trouble by the same demon. Drugs.

"Why?" Ma asked, breaking the silence of the car ride. Just as I had expected, her eyes were soft with disappointment and her mouth fell just enough so a small frown curved her lips.

"I didn't think we were going to get pulled over." I mumbled pathetically. It was probably the worst excuse I could come up with but it was also the only one that was running through my head. I looked out the van's window into the cold Detroit night; a thin layer of snow was on the frozen December ground. Every once in a while, a group of men, or even more sadly a group of boys, would be huddled together out on a corner. Probably shuffling through the same shit that had earned me a two hundred and fifty dollar fine and twenty hours of community service.

"Is that right, Abigail?" Ma asked calmly. She hadn't even raised her voice at me or Jack and his blood test had even came back with a trace of methamphetamine and weed. "The point is not that you two got caught, it's that you shouldn't be doing something that's so harmful to you. This just shows that you might be able to get away with doing drugs for a while but eventually you get caught. Is this what you two are doing with your life?" She looked at me through the rear view mirror and her eyes had all the conviction that I had feared. She turned and looked at Jack, "I'm just disappointed in you two. I know you're both better than this."

I dropped my head ashamed. I could feel a knot ball up in my throat. "Sorry Ma." I said, my voice heavy and thick.

"Sorry." Jack echoed quickly after.

"I don't want you to apologize. I just want to know that you've learned." I knew Ma was done conversing the situation even if she wasn't done being disappointed. She didn't even ground us or anything. Just her voicing her disappointment was enough to make me feel guilty for the rest of the week. Maybe she thought the twenty fucking hours of community service would be enough punishment anyways.

We turned the corner and rolled onto our street. The houses all looked about identical: Run down two stories with closed in porches. The only differences was the color of the chipped siding and stages of wear on the bricks. I was so relieved to see the fading yellow siding of our house after having to look at the starch white walls of the holding cell. Even seeing the beat up old piece of banged up metal that Bobby called a car was-

Shit, shit, shit! I looked at the clock hastily, was it really 1:49 in the morning? Wasn't Bobby coming home tomorrow morning? How early in the morning did he mean? One o'clock? Bobby was going to flip a shit. He was always really irrational about things like this. Like the time I got suspended from school for three days for smoking in the bathroom. He acted like it with biggest fucking deal ever and it didn't even matter when I had tried to explain that I hadn't even taken a puff yet. Apparently, once again, that _wasn't the point_.

"When did Bobby get back?" I asked Ma as we pulled into the back driveway. I scoped the house strategically, looking for lights or any signs of movement on the inside. Except for the kitchen light which was always on, the house was dark.

I looked to Ma for an answer; a barely visible smile graced her lips. "He must have got here after I left to pick you two knuckleheads up. So sometime after nine I guess." She said putting the car in park and turning off the ignition.

After I finished mentally hammering that last nail into my coffin that I had been building since I had bought the drugs, I crossed my arms and sulked. I dragged myself out of the car and up the front porch. Bobby could be such a hard ass sometimes. I looked over at Jack who looked like his precious guitar had just been smashed to smithereens. We both waited for Ma to open the front door and then quietly slipped in behind her.

We waited for something to happen, like for an enraged Bobby to come stomping into the kitchen full of ridiculous threats and his usual insults. Ma quietly got a glass down and filled it from the tap.

"Do you two need anything?" She asked, looking at us expectantly.

This was all the dismissal we needed. Jack made the first move up the back stairs and then I followed him, literally stepping on his heels. He pushed me into the wall of the small staircase. "Fucktard." I mumbled shoving him back.

"You know what, fuck you Abby!" He exploded and pushed me back, using his elbow and knee to pin me against the staircase wall. His voice boomed at his apparent pent up anger at me, "I do you a fucking favor and now I am deeper in shit than you! I oughta pound you into the ground the way you just screwed me over."

"Oh bullshit," I yelled at his stupid attempt at threatening me as well as blaming me for his problems as I tried to push him off me. "How the hell is it my fault that you're a fucking idiot for failing a drug test! Don't get mad at me because you pop pills."

His elbow pushed harder into my collar bone and his knee dug deep into my leg. We eyed each other dangerously, each trying to push our problems onto the other. Our breaths were heavy and my heart was beating hard. Jack and me didn't usually do this. We always pretty much got along, which made this moment even more tense and infuriating.

"What the hell?" Bobby's voice asked from the top of the stairs. After a moment of hesitation, we both looked up at him. He wore a pair of old sweatpants and a baffled grin. His hair was tousled from sleep instead of it's usual slicked back precision. Bewildered amusement caked his voice as he asked, "Is this about Barbies again? Jack, I told you you can't _always_ be Ken."

Jack rolled his eyes and pushed off me, hard. He stomped up the rest of the stairs and slammed his bedroom door before I had even had a chance to move.

"Nice to see you too dipshit." Bobby hollered at Jack's closed door which received a barely audible, "Go to hell." in return.

That was just like him to bottle everything up and then explode. Passive aggressive prick. Yeah, sure, I shouldn't have been carrying weed but seriously, forty-seven in a thirty? That's the real crime. He was practically driving like a-

"What was that all about?" Bobby's voice broke into my thoughts.

"Nothing." I mumbled as I trudged up the stairs. For real, who the hell did Jack think he was? Like _he's_ never got caught with weed before? What a joke! He's just pissed off because he got two full weekends of community service. It's not my fucking fault he tried Ritalin two weeks ago. Tough shit for-

"Abby!"

"What?" I asked sharply as I passed him. I went into the bathroom, but Bobby was in the doorway before I had a chance to shut the door.

"I asked you what happened?" He said.

"And I said 'nothing.'" I retorted evenly. He set his jaw and looked like he was about to get pissed off. Of course Bobby had to know everyone's business whether they wanted him to know or not. I tried to think through the best way of wording my response without triggering his overflowing fountain of anger. "Look, Bobby, I'm really tired and I had a long night. Jack is being a tool and all I want to do is brush my teeth and go to bed." I whined but he didn't look like he was going to leave, so I went for the easy out. "Fine, if you really want to know..." I took a deep breath, "Jack got a speeding ticket."

He looked at me in disbelief. "And that's what you two girls were pulling hair about?" He laughed out loud. "A fucking ticket? Jesus."

"Yeah, I know it's crazy." I squeezed a generous amount of toothpaste onto my brush, ran it under water, and went to work. I tried to talk to him as a I brushed my teeth. "Nice to see you home." Spit. "Shit, it's been like six fucking weeks." Spit. "What have you been doing?" Spit. I rinsed off my brush and set it in the holder. I tried to walk past him to my room but Bobby didn't move out of the entryway.

"Hey princess you can't stay and talk to your big brother for two minutes? Like you said, it's been six _fucking_ weeks." He said mockingly. "Ma said you got a couple of detentions the other week and now you're getting speeding tickets? What are you some kind of bad ass now?" His voice was laced in patronization.

It was always a fun time the first day or two that Bobby came home. Always a good laugh whenever he called you out on all the things that he had missed from when he was gone. Nothing like it really.

I rolled my eyes. "Jack got the speeding ticket and it was _one_ detention. Besides, the teacher was being a complete bitch. Seriously, it's not like she's never heard the words 'fuck you' before." He let me duck under his arm that was blocking my way and I moved past him and into my room. When I realized he was following, I stood behind my door, ready to push it shut the second he decided to get himself and his disapproving look out of the way. I rolled my eyes yet again. "Please. Don't act like you didn't pull stupider shit than that in school."

"That's not the point." Of course it wasn't. "You should stop trying to act like you're such tough shit and worry about school instead." I slipped into full-on teenager mode and planted an 'I could give two shits' look on my face. "Spend less time with your head up your ass and you might just learn a couple things. Between you and Jack, I just might need to stick around to keep you two dumb asses out of trouble."

He eyed me, assumingly annoyed at my lack of response.

A few seconds passed before he said, "Give me a hug." and opened his arms. I wrapped my arms around him. Despite his annoyingly parental lecture, I was happy to have him home. Not that I would ever say this out loud, but I always felt safer whenever Bobby was around. I could do without all his name calling and spiel-giving bullshit, but other than that, he was okay. Of course, I imagined I might like him around a little less after he got the whole story of the night from Ma, but I tucked that thought away to be dealt with in the morning.

"Shit, kid," Bobby yawned and tussled my hair as we pulled away from the hug. "You need to get to bed so I don't have to deal with your cranky ass in the morning."

"Not a kid." I mumbled as he started down the hallway towards his own room.

He threw his hand in the air dismissively "Yeah, yeah, yeah...I'm just glad to see your ugly face again."


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for all the reviews! **

**Big thanks to the TheImmortalChaplin for all her help!**

**Hope you all enjoy this chapter!**

**:)**

* * *

I laid in my bed willing myself to fall back asleep. All I wanted to do was escape to a magical dream world where a more understanding and peaceful Bobby Mercer existed. I could hear his barely muffled rant raging below in the kitchen and the last thing I wanted to do was go face it. Unfortunately, I figured I could be sitting in my room for the next month before Bobby would even calm down about it. I heard the kitchen door slam shut and the kind of silence settled in the house that could only mean that Bobby had stepped out.

I peered stealthily out my bedroom window. He was walking down the street with both hands shoved forcefully in his pocket and his shoulders broad and hunched. I took a deep breath. Just thinking about having to face Bobby was wearing me out. And I swear the back of my head was already starting to smart from the smack I'm sure it was going to receive.

I heard the stifled sound of an engine starting and saw Ma's van slowly pulling out of the drive. She didn't have work for another two hours but with Bobby back she probably needed to go buy out the grocery store. As the old mini van made its way down the street I hoped I wasn't looking at the retreating end of salvation.

I took a deep breath and decided to go grab a pop-tart real fast before Bobby got back. I treaded carefully past Jack's room, not wanting to deal with him so early in the morning and then darted quickly down the stairs. In a total of about eight seconds I flew across the kitchen floor, grabbed the box of pop-tarts, and shot back up the stairway. I was two steps from entering the safety of my bedroom when I heard Jack's voice.

"Abby!"

Damnit. I stopped, I really did not want to deal with him. I raised a foot lightly and tried to step into my room and feign not hearing him.

Then Jack ruined my plan. "Abby, I just saw you." A bit of annoyance lacing his voice. I rolled my eyes and slowly made my way to stand in his doorway. Jack was tangled up in his sheets, with his face smashed into his pillow, and his hair trying to pull away from his head.

I eyed him apprehensively.

"Look Abs, I feel kinda bad about last night." As he fucking should, considering the bruise forming from were his knee had dug into my leg. "I never should of blamed that on you, even though you're a complete dumbass for carrying 8 grams, but I was just pissed that I got caught on Ritalin." he paused. "We cool?"

I shook my head and crawled up onto the end of his bed. "Well as long as were having a chick flick moment," I dodged a kick to the ribs, "I would like to apologize for selling you out to Bobby last night."

He looked at me in disbelief. "Did you really?" He shook his head and buried it in his pillow. "I would've done the same thing." he admitted.

I laughed and leaned my head back against the wall. A small draft of icy wind snuck through the window that was above Jack's bed. "Pop-tart?" I held out the box full of delicious chocolate pastry goodness. He grabbed one and tore at the foil.

I had almost finished both of my pastries when Jack's phone started beeping. He reached under his pillow and fished it out. "Jer." He grunted, flipping the phone open. Jack started to say hello but was cut off but incomprehensible yelling. Jack pulled the phone away from his ear and sat straight up.

I stuffed the rest of the pop tart in my mouth to cover up my grin at Jack's shocked face. He struggled to break into the conversation, "Jerry, man, listen-". I could just see Jerry pacing his kitchen floor, his arms flying violently, and his mouth racing at a dangerous speed. I brushed the crumbs off my shirt and crumpled the foil into my hand all while listening to Jerry's abuse of Jack. Jack looked at me, "Pissed off." he mouthed. I rolled my eyes, of course he was. "How's he know?"

Jack shrugged, sat the phone down between the both of us, turned on the speaker, and went back to eating his pop-tart. Jerry's voice filled the room as he raged on. He was talking so fast that it took a couple of seconds to comprehend anything. "Christ." I mouthed and Jack shook his head in agreement. I had never heard Jerry so mad but I guess he had never had his kid brother and sister get arrested.

The only other time I could think of him _really _being pissed off was from one of my first few weeks at Ma's house. Bobby had somehow came in possession of fireworks that I am pretty sure were illegal and decided to have a little post-fourth of July celebration in late October. Or at least that's what he tried to tell the cops. Of course, being as impatient and impulsive as Bobby is, he decided to launch all the fireworks at once. Which in turn resulted in a bowling ball sized divot in Ma's garden , a singed eyebrow on Bobby's forehead, and a pile of ash for Jerry. And I'm sure, as every freaking person in Detroit knows, that pile of ash was once Jerry's precious tree house.

Jerry didn't talk to Bobby for a week and once he decided to talk to him he didn't have anything good to say. Even now, whenever it's brought up, there is always a tinge of bitterness in his voice.

"Jack, boy, you had better be listen' to me! You hear?' Jerry's voice yelled through the phone.

"Yeah, Jer, right here." Jack responded, as pieces of pop-tart fell out of his mouth.

"Man, put Abby on the phone!" I immediately shook my head no to Jack.

"Tell him I'm in the bathroom." I mouthed.

"No."

"Tell him I'm busy."

"No."

"Tell him I'm sleeping!"

"Fine." He said and I smirked, Jack was always a sucker for helping a sister out. He grabbed the phone and held it up to his mouth. "Jerry, she's right here." He said and handed the phone over to me with a stupid grin on his face.

I punched him in the arm "Douchbag!"

I reluctantly held the phone up to my ear. "What's up Jer?"

"Girl, don't you 'what's up me'!" He said sassily. "Did you lose your fucking mind, cause I'm going to help you find it real quick! If ya'll cannot find something better to do with your time than you better god damn bet I will! You must think your some kind of-"

He prattled on for another two minutes and eventually tired out saying "I gotta go but you better believe that this is _not _over!" and hung up.

I threw the phone down. "That was exhausting." Jack agreed and grabbed his cigarettes from his windowsill. I scrunched up my nose "Jack it's only 9:30. Do you really need to smoke?" I could not stand the smell of cigarette smoke.

"Yeah, I do." He shot me the annoyed glance he always does whenever I complain about his smoking habits all while flipping the lighter and holding it to his cig. "Jer stressed me out."

"Pussy." He blew out his smoky breath into my face. I coughed obnoxiously and hopped off his bed. "So we gotta do something about this whole Bobby thing." I let the rest of the sentence hang in the air.

* * *

When it came down to it, Jack's idea of 'handling the Bobby situation' was to avoid it for as long as possible. Great fucking plan. I decided that I could pretend to be sleeping all morning but that would only buy me, at the most, four hours. And that was only if Bobby didn't charge into my room before then which was highly likely. However, without actually confronting Bobby, that seemed like the best option.

I decided to make a quick trip down stairs for some Tylenol for the headache that would surely erupt when Bobby's voice did. I stood at the top of the staircase and listened carefully. After convincing myself that all was secure I tiptoed carefully down the stairs. I was literally five small steps from the floor when the kitchen door swung open. I froze.

I wasn't able to form a coherent thought until Bobby's eyes were staring at me from the bottom of the staircase and even then my only thought was _shit_. He squared around and motioned for me to come all the way down the stairs. I suppose this was a good sign that he didn't start yelling the second he saw me, maybe his walk had cooled him off.

I slowly trudged down the stairs and took a seat on the last one figuring I might as well get comfortable since I was about to get a brutal tongue lashing and maybe an odd smack or two. Once I built up my courage I looked up at Bobby, who was staring at me, consenting that he could now get on with it.

He bent down and picked up my shoes that were strewn with various other pairs at the bottom of the landing and threw them at me. I looked at him in shock, "Are you kicking me out?" I held the shoes dejectedly in each hand.

He threw my coat at me. "No you idiot, were going outside."

I took a relieved breath and then spared a quick glance out the kitchen door. "Bobby there's a foot of fresh snow out there." I stated. "Can't we talk here?" I was pushing my luck but for real it was going to be cold, and snowy, and not to mention-

He confirmed my idea that I was definitely pushing my luck with a unnerving glare. So I obediently slipped my shoes and coat on. I stood up as Bobby opened the kitchen door. "Look, Bobby, I know I fucked up-"

"Just shut up." He said giving me a shove out the door. "We're going to talk."

I rolled my eyes at him behind his back. I doubted the fact that _we_, as in _both _of us, as in me _and _him, as in _I_, was going to do any of the talking. And I even doubted the fact that we would be _talking_. I was betting it would be a pretty loud and one sided conversation.

Bobby headed for the neighborhood park. The sun was hidden behind a layer of gray clouds that looked thick enough to be split with a butter knife. It wasn't even ten in the morning so the bitter cold from the December night was still thick in the air. The only noise was the crunching of our shoes on last night's snow. When we got to the park Bobby took a seat on a picnic table that was shielded from snow by the safety of a tree.

I took a seat next to him, at the end of the bench.

"You're starting to be a real pain in the ass." Bobby began. "Lately every time I've talked to Ma she's worried about your grades, or attitude, or friends, or what you're doing when you're not home. I'm sure you know all this though, right?"

"Yeah, you're right."

"Well, I'm tired of watching you act like you give two shits about yourself. Shut up Abby." He snapped when I opened my mouth. "Just shut the hell up and listen." He took a calming breath as a little bit of his usual angry self leaked through. "This drug shit stops. You smoke pot now and soon enough you won't get your fix, so you'll be popping xanex or oxycontin."

"I would never-"

"Everyone says that," He snapped. "I told you to shut up. Now shut the fuck up until I'm done. You were 8 when you left mom so you pry don't know this but she did it all. Glass, heroin, speed anything to get a high and she would do whatever it took to get it. So addiction runs in your blood and if you think you won't get hooked you better start thinking otherwise."

"I don't think that."

Bobby leaned closer. "Are you going to shut up or do I need to help you?"

Because I _felt_ like I was 8 again, I shut up.

"Things have changed for you. You've been given a fucking chance at life. You have an opportunity to do something; anything. I mean, I don't expect you to be a fucking doctor or something, but I will be damned if I'm going to twiddle my fucking thumbs while you throw it all away. Have you ever stopped to think what would have happened if your scrawny, bitchy, annoying ass hadn't ever landed at Ma's? Do I need a sharp rock to chip away at your thick skull? You are so lucky—hell, we all are, and you're getting arrested for dope at 15. Jesus. And then, to top it off, you fucking _lied_ about something that you knew I was going to find out about anyways? _Jack got a speeding ticket." _Bobby mocked my voice before continuing, "What the hell's wrong with you? You think you can go through life lying in order to try and cover your own ass? But let me tell you, if you _ever_ lie to me like that again, I will shove my foot so far up your ass that you will be tasting mud for a week!". He continued his rant for a few more minutes before trailing off momentarily.

He took a breath and ran his hands through his hair. "So what's it going to take for you to change? Do I need to be breathing down your fucking neck every two seconds? Or maybe just lock you in your room?"

"I'm sorry"

Bobby threw his hands up in frustration. "Christ Abby, I don't want you be sorry! I just want you to fucking understand."

"I understand. I understand." I threw my hands up in defeat. "I don't want to be like _her_. I should've never bought it."

"That's another fucking good question, who the hell sold you weed?"

I locked up, before I had always just smoked Jack's weed with Jack. But since I was going to be going to a party without Jack I didn't very well think he would let me have any of his stash. That's why I had decided to buy my own. And there was no way in hell I was going to be able to show my face at school if Bobby ended up beating the shit out if the kid who sold me weed. That kid probably dealt to a couple dozen other kids, I would have my head on a platter.

"A dealer."

"No shit." Bobby prodded. "Name?"

I hesitated. "I think it was…well- I'm not quite sure."

Bobby ran his hand down his face. "Of course you don't." A group of kids made their way into the park and Bobby took it as our cue to leave. "Right. Well, will just deal with that one later."

Bobby stood up and I followed suit. "You do not know how much I've been dreading that conversation. I was pretty sure you were going to kick my ass." Bobby shot me a sidelong glance. "You're _not _going to kick my ass…right?"

"Shit, am I that kind of brother? I just wanted to talk." Bobby slung a friendly arm around my shoulder. "And do this." He smacked me upside the head and shoved me into a snow pile. "I don't know why," Bobby said as I lifted myself up "but that always makes me feel better."

I tried to dust the snow off me before it thoroughly soaked me through, "glad I could help."


	4. Chapter 4

**Ohhh, Summer. Isn't it nice?**

**This chapter is in dedication to StraightLife116**

**because NO WAY was I getting this up anytime soon without your help!**

* * *

By the time we got back I was chilled to the bone because Bobby had taken the liberty of shoving me into two more snow piles on the way home. I had snow sticking all over me and my coat and shoes were soaked completely through.

"Go take a shower and warm up." Bobby suggested taking off his _dry _coat and shoes. It's not like he's the fucking reason that my teeth are chattering or anything.

"Yeah, thanks." I said dryly.

"And try not to get snow everywhere." He motioned to the floor around me that had small piles of snow and water flooding it. "I'd hate for you to get in trouble because you water logged Ma's flooring."

If I wasn't already on a short leash I might have let a few choice words fly but instead I sneered at him and marched up the stairs. "Send Jack-ass down here too!" he called after me.

"Anything for you." I mumbled under my breath as I started the shower water and then continued into Jack's room.

Surprise and amusement covered his face when he saw my appearance. "Yeah, yeah, yeah…" I said as he opened his mouth, no doubt to make some stupid comment. "Bobby wants you next."

"Is it bad?"

For a second I thought about feeding him some exaggerated bullshit but then I remembered how nervous Jack could get when people were mad at him. I remembered back to when he had only been living with Ma for a couple of months when I first came. And whenever anyone touched him he used to flinch like crazy. I actually had innocently thought that he had something wrong with him.

I shook my head. "No, but just save yourself the trouble and keep your mouth shut."

He reluctantly dragged himself past me and trotted down to meet his fate. If I wasn't soaking wet I would've lingered at the top of the stairs and listened but instead I shut myself into the bathroom. I peeled off my shirt and my long black hair, which was strung with ice, fell coldly on my bare back. I quickly jumped into the shower and let the steaming hot water warm me up.

There was really nothing like a hot steaming shower in the middle of a cold Detroit winter. If I stayed in long enough I could manage to complete fog up the window and block out the view of snow and cold. Sometimes, much to my siblings chagrin, I would just stand in the shower until the very last drop of hot water was used. I figured now was a good time to do that, after all, I was feeling a little selfish after having to pull myself out of three snow piles.

A sudden commotion erupted down stairs and I was honestly surprised it had taken so long for Bobby to explode. I mean, Jesus, this was Bobby Mercer, he should've sprang a hernia by now. An elephant seemed to be bounding up the stairs and before I knew it the bathroom door was swinging open.

"Abby, get your skinny ass out that damn shower right now!"

Why couldn't that damn bathroom lock ever work? I poked my head out of the side of the curtain. "Fuck. Angel, I just got in here! Give me a minute will ya?" What the hell had gotten into him?

"Girl you better turn that water off." Suddenly all the hot water turned cold and I could here the sink running, Angel had turned on the hot tap and stormed out of the bathroom, slamming the door.

What the fuck just happened? He was always the one to spend his time holed up in the bathroom but he usually gave me a couple minutes of warning before he barged in and flipped the sink so my water turned cold. I mean aside from the obvious pot thing I didn't understand what that whole production was about. It's not like he doesn't fly high every once in a while. And it's not like he _didn't _know I smoked pot, at least I think he knew. I mean he wasn't-

A fist banging on the bathroom door shattered my thoughts, "Abby, you had better be turning that water off or I swear to God-" His threat was left hanging as I quickly flipped the shower off and grabbed a towel. Why did it seem like Bobby was being my most rational brother right now? Was that even possible? "Angel, what do you want?" I wrapped a towel around me as I shouted out the door.

"I'd like to knock some sense into ya!" I rolled my eyes, get in line.

I pulled on some clothes and opened the door. "Do you think you could be a little more clear because-"

Angel grabbed a handful of my shirt and started pulling me downstairs. He pushed me towards a chair in the living room.

"Christ, Ang, will you tell me what-" I started to get up.

"Sit," Angel ordered pointing at the chair "we're talking." Did everyone think they needed to have a talk with me? Because I would've been just fine if all the talking had ended last night with me and Ma in the van. Why didn't my brother's put this much effort into my birthday or Christmas presents? Bobby and Jack, who must have been in the kitchen, wandered their way into the living room. Bobby's 'what's going on?' fell on deaf ears as Angel demanded, "Tell me who you bought from and don't even think about lying to me."

"I don't want to talk about it." I said reflexively.

How was I ever going to be able to go back to school if everyone knew that I had ratted out my dealer who was now in a coma at the hands of my big brothers? Besides wasn't it about time we started forgetting about this whole incident I mean jeez, it had to be about 14 hours ago by now.

"I didn't ask what you wanted. I'm telling you to give me a name!" Angel's patience drained like a toilet. He took a dangerous step closer and I could see Jack shift in his seat at the tension filling the room.

I opened my mouth and then closed it. "I'm not 100% sure about his name. I-"

"Abby."

"Fine, it's Tyrone. Tyrone Brown."

"Damnit, I knew it!" He rubbed at his face. "And I suppose you know that he rapped a girl once when she tried to buy from him?"

"No, I didn't know-"

"Yeah, you know I didn't believe Sophie last night when she told me her brother heard you bought from him. I said 'Nah, my sis don't do that shit'. But apparently I was a fucking fool. How could you be so-." He stopped and tried to gain his diminishing composure. "You know how easily he could've-" He sat down, at a loss for words.

I turned and chanced a glance at Bobby who was uncharacteristically quiet. His knuckles matched the white of the milk jug they were wrapped around and his eyes shown a glint of hazel that was usually reserved for different company. He opened his mouth to speak but Jack's voice filled the room instead.

"That's my dealer. That's why Abby went to him." Bobby's jaw tightened. "It's my fault, I didn't think that she would ever try to buy from him. I-I didn't know." He finished looking regretfully at his feet.

There was the slightest amount of hesitation before Bobby blew his top. "What the fuck is wrong with you two! Did you lose your god damn minds. Jesus Christ. You can't just go around buying from rapist."

"When you put it that-" I mumbled.

Bobby pointed an accusing finger at me. "You. You just keep shut" His teeth were gritted and his voice was thick with anger.

So we were going back to _that_ game again. "Obviously I can't trust you to tell me anything.' He said, referring to last nights incident. "So, I guess me and Angel are going to solve this shit ourselves. Angel you know where he deals?" Angel nodded his head. "Good, get your shit. Let's go."

I stood up and decided if I didn't say something now than I never would get to. "Bobby, you're making this all a big fucking deal and it doesn't have to be. It's just fricking pot, everyone smokes pot, hell I know the names of more drug dealers than teachers. Besides you can't just go and beat the shit out of some-" Bobby turned at me and the small but dangerous lift of his brow had me sitting quietly back in my chair.

"What the hell don't you get about 'shutting up'?" He took a step so he was hovering over me. "It's not _just pot _you idiot. It's drugs and I'm not just going to let you get away with taking drugs." He roughly grabbed my arm. "And if you're having such a hard time understanding that than maybe you need some extra help." He wasn't yelling but you could clearly hear the threat in his voice.

I looked away from him. "I understand." I mumbled, and he squeezed my arm a little harder. "I understand." I said louder as I dragged my eyes to his.

"Good," he patted me forcibly on the head "that's a good girl."

Jack and I had both locked ourselves into our rooms by the time we heard the rumblings of Bobby and Angel making their way back. Jack had seemed genuinely depressed that he would now be forced to find a new dealer, but I was just pissed. For real, you buy from a dealer once.

It wasn't like they hadn't all done it. I could see Jerry getting pissed because once he hit high school he pretty much kept on the straight and narrow road. But Bobby and Angel's roads were so curved that nobody else would dare to walk it. Angel was still one of the most renown hustler in the neighborhood despite the fact that he's practically been shipped off the past six years.

I was just tired of it. Having to deal with all their bullshit all the time. I couldn't decide if it was because I was a girl or the youngest. But they needed to back off. I didn't need them to go off beating people shitless because I bought some grass from them. How was I suppose to learn my own lessons if there trying to solve all my problems for me? The saying was live and learn, not kind of live and have your brothers solve your problems for you.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks to all of you who left your sweet reviews.**

**It is so cool to be able to see what you all enjoyed most.**

**Hope you 3 this chapter, woohoo! **

* * *

"Rise and shine princess." A sudden burst of light flooded my room as the shades snapped open. "Get your ass up."

The voice, and the man who owned it, had me groaning. I flopped onto my stomach and pulled my pillow over my head. "Go away."

"If you think you're skipping school today, think again." With some force Bobby yanked the pillow away. "Up."

I opened one eye and rolled over glancing at my clock. Fucking 7:00. I turned back around and dug my face into my sheets. I never even rolled out of bed until at least 7:30, it's not like first period is that important anyways. "Vas te faire encule." I mumbled, using the only phrase from my French class that I had bothered to learn.

"If you think I haven't been in enough Canadian strip joints to know that means 'Fuck you' than you're an idiot."

I threw my hand up, testing his sign language skills too; he was fluent. Bobby ripped my sheets away, grabbed my ankles and threw me to the floor.

"Shit!" Cold, my elbow singing were it had hit the floor, I glared up at Bobby. "What the hell is wrong with you? This is _my _room! I don't go into your room when you're sleeping and pull you out of bed!"

"Get dressed. I'm taking you and Jackie to school in twenty."

I stood up defiantly . "Bobby Ma can drop me off like she always does. Or I will ride the bus. Or I'll walk."

"No you won't, get dressed."

I started to argue but a hard punch in the arm shoved the words right back into my mouth. "Nineteen minutes now, lets go."

I stomped to my closet, angry at the injustice of it all, slamming open the door, "shit head".

I threw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt and sluggishly found my way into the bathroom. Despite the fact that all my siblings were boys the bathroom was always the most high traffic area. Angel, per usual, was hogging the mirror with his big shiny head. "Angel get out! You don't even have any fucking hair!" I grumbled shoving my way past him to the cabinets.

"Shut up ugly." He retorted, his elbow nailing me in the shoulder, as I moved my way behind him.

I grabbed a hair tie from the cabinet and quickly wrapped my hair up in a bun. Jack was staring out the window as he blew his nose. "Hey Jack." He nodded at me but kept his eyes focused outside. He was clad in his usual uniform of jeans, band shirt, and leather jacket.

Jack hated school, more than anyone I knew. It probably went hand in hand with the fact that he skipped school more than anyone I knew as well. Not like I blamed him. No one cares at school. No one gives two shits about you. Not the teachers. Not the kids. No one. Hell if you thought the Detroit streets were tough than you oughta try surviving the schools.

I reached around Angel, who was now appearing to inspect his pores, and snagged my toothbrush. I squeezed a sloppy amount of toothpaste on the bristles. "Ang, you got work this morning?" It had been about seven months since Angel got done with his years in the marines. I don't think he missed it much. I've found that Angel is only as happy as the women he is with. So I'm sure glad I wasn't around him when he wasn't getting any ass on that big boat.

"Yeah, I got four damn cars I need to get caught up on." He sighed, referring to his mechanical work. "Got to be up at the break of dawn just to catch up on that shit."

"Yet, here it is, seven in the morning and you're not a work.." Jack chimed in as he too started brushing his teeth.

"Shut up Jackie-poo." Angel threw his work shirt on and left the bathroom.

I rinsed off my toothbrush. "You going to school today?"

Jack shrugged. "Not if I can help it." He said referring to the possible bother that Bobby could be on the whole hooky situation.

"Well if your skipping than grab me too." I leaned on the bathroom entrance way. No way was I going to stay in school if Jack was out. Especially if I had people trying to level me all day. "We're going to get the shit beat out of us aren't we?"

Jack considered for a moment as he put his tooth brush away. "Not if I can help it."

I stalked into the kitchen and grabbed a pop tart from the pantry. "What the hell's wrong with Bobby?" I demanded of Ma, who was drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. "He yanked me out of bed at the crack of dawn and _insisted _on dropping me and Jack off at school."

"Oh I was wondering…" Ma mumbled, probably recalling the loud thump she heard this morning. "Honey, I think Bobby is in a fine mood but he's waiting out in the car and you might want to get out there before you ruin it."

"Sure didn't seem like he was in that great of a mood when he manhandled me out of bed." I complained as I walked outside.

I opened the door to Bobby's piece of shit car and climbed past Jack. "Ugh." I sneered my nose and pushed around all the crap in the backseat while managing to find a seatbelt holder. "This is gross." I enunciated clearly. "Why don't you clean this shit out?" I kicked at an old fast food bag that smelt like stale fries.

"Good idea, maybe you can help me with that?" He suggested as he pulled onto the street. I kept quiet trying to avoid talking myself into cleaning his car for him. We drove in silence for a while, the only noise being Bobby's shitty eighties music and the clanking of his car. Bobby waited until we were a block from school until he started his speal. "If you two have any troubles today I want you to tell me. If any bastard looks at you funny or coughs in your direction than I want to know. Got it?"

I rolled my eyes, "Bobby how would you beating up more people solve the problem? Seems to me that you beating up one person is going to cause us enough fucking problems."

"Yeah Bobby, you can't be at school with us." Jack added. "So what the hell do you want us to do? Get the shit beat out of us and then come fucking tattling to you so you can continue the cycle? Fuck that."

I crossed my arms and looked expectantly at Bobby.

He angrily eyed us both and I knew that we had finally flipped the switch that had seemed to be out for the last few days. "I don't need your two sorry asses opinions. Me and Angel did you guys a fucking favor last night and now you two are going to bitch about it." He pulled the car up to the school entrance. "If anyone messes with you, you tell me and I will take care of it and that will be the end of it. Got it?"

His knuckles were gripping the steering wheel with vice like power and he stared straight ahead, taking heavy breaths. "For the last time, I will not sit back and watch you two make the same mistakes as every other fuck up in Detroit. I know all the kids in your class do it, I know that, but I will not fucking watch you do it. And if that means me personally taking people out than I will be happy to do it. Maybe you think that sucks but honestly I couldn't give another shit. So is that clear?"

We both nodded, even though I didn't understand why he thought it was his responsibility to handle all this. Hadn't he made it by himself? He didn't have anybody that knocked out every kid who looked at him funny. I didn't need all them breathing down my neck all the fucking time. I just couldn't pinpoint if it was because I was youngest or I was girl that my brother's felt I did. But whatever it was I was fucking fed up with all of it.

"Now are you two going to go to class? Or do I need to sit outside the school and watch?"

Jack opened the door and slid the seat up so I could get out. "We'll go to class Bobby."

"_All_ of them."

"Yeah, sure."

I didn't really expect to keep to Jack's word about going to _all _my classes but I expected to stay longer than the end of second passing period. And I suppose I would've if it had taken longer for Tyron, the drug dealer's, girlfriend to find me.

"What the fuck!" I yelled as I pulled myself up from the ground after I slammed into a locker. I turned around to find a girl who had to be thirty pounds heavier than me. Her jeans looked like they were painted on and her stomach jiggled as she furiously stood over me. "What the fuck's wrong with you?" I squared up to her just in case she decided to push me again.

"You Mercers are, your god damn brothers jumped my boo last night!" Her head and fingers were waving madly as she shouted at me. "Raided his fucking corner and tore him up! He looks like a god damn monster! My baby cried when he saw his own daddy." She handed her huge golden hoops to her friend "Can't a man try and support his baby mama? Get beat up just for doing his fucking job. That ain't fair, it fucking ain't, and now I gotta even it up." She rolled up her sleeves like she was literally going to work.

I wasn't really much of a fighter. That didn't mean I _couldn't_ fight it just meant I wasn't very good at it. I wasn't exactly the biggest white girl around Detroit and I definitely wasn't the strongest. I mean I could take a punch as good as anyone, my brother's had ensured me of that, and I would fight till the end. But as I eyed the girl up and down I was pretty sure that I would be on the losing end of this battle.

"Maybe your fucking pussy ass, tough talking, fuck up brother's will think twice before hitting up my-"

I jumped her. Somehow though, maybe she expected me to do that, she was on top of me before I had a chance to lay a punch. I covered my arms with my face and blocked the blows. I could hear a crowd forming as the volume quickly grew and I decided, in a somewhat pathetic attempt to fight back, to flail my arms. I took a blow to the mouth but I managed to knock her in the nose. Her hands instinctively shot to cover her face and I took the time to twist around and catch her on the cheek. I started to pull back and knock her weed stained teeth out but before I could I was being pulled off her by the hood of my sweatshirt.

I lurched at her despite the strong grip on my hood and now my arm. "Fucking bitch!" I yelled at her laying form on the ground, "my family-" Another hard tug on my hood had me catching my breath as I was pulled outside the school's doors. "Let go!" I demanded breathlessly as I once again tried to pull away from my restrainer.

"Abby," I was thrown against the brick wall and the air whooshed out of me "stop." Jack had me pinned against the wall. "Stop!" He ordered.

It took me a second but I managed to clear the red from my vision. I relaxed against the brick and Jack let go and stepped back. Fuck. I sank against the wall. Fuck. I brought my hand to my bottom lip and pulled away with blood. Fuck. The doors we had left from, opened and a teacher came out searching for us.

Jack grabbed my arm and pulled me up. "Let's go." We both ran towards the schools parking lot and to the next block. "Okay," Jack slowed down "now we just got to watch for the cops."

I pulled my hood up and me and Jack fell into a pace as we slowly and cautiously made our way away from the school. I couldn't decide if I wanted to cry or be mad so I settled for something in between.

"Did you see her Jack? She fucking just…just attacked me. I didn't even do anything." My voice broke at the last part and Jack threw a brotherly arm around my shoulder. I hid my hands in my sleeves and wiped at my teary eyes. "I was just-She said something about Angel and Bobby so I…I didn't know what to do and then-" I was failing miserably at trying to explain everything as I tried to keep my composure.

Jack pulled me closer. "I know."

He waited until I had stopped sniffling before he continued. "I was just glad I had happened to be walking by. I figured something like this would happen to one of-." He pulled me into an alley way as a cop car cruised down the street. We waited for the slow moving vehicle to pass. "Was it his sister or what?"

'Girlfriend."

"Ah, she was big." He smirked. "And mad. I honestly can not believe I had to pull _you _off _her!"_

I ducked my head and grinned. I was pretty awesome I guess. "She pissed me off."

We continued walking until we reached the last block from our house and then we stalled. "Is Bobby going to be mad?" I asked digging the foot of my shoe into the snow.

"Nah, he might be mad about your face but not leaving school." Jack guaranteed and then grabbed my chin inspect my face.

"Bad?"

He grimaced. "Your lips split pretty good and you got a gash above your forehead and your eye might be a little black." He slapped me lightly on the cheek and let go. "So just as bad as usual."

"Thanks." I mumbled dryly but was grateful for his lightness. I gazed over to our house. Bobby's car wasn't in the driveway but some other rusted up piece was. "Jack who's car is that?" I started walking over to the house. "I didn't think it was a neighbor's car but for some reason I was sure I recognized it.

"Maybe Angel's 'borrowing' a car from the shop." Jack suggested.

I shook my head. "No, I know that car." Why did I know that car? I stood on the opposite side of the street and peered through it's window, empty. "Jack, I know that car." I insisted as I took a step to cross the street.

Jack threw his hand out to stop me. "Wait," he whispered "look at the porch."

I turned my attention towards our front porch. A women who could have been blown away by a gust of wind was cautiously scaling the steps. She was swimming in old faded blue jeans and a big winter coat. Her hair was just barely poking out from her pulled hood. She seemed to be trying to go unnoticed as she fingered the mailbox that hung next to the front door. She reached into her purse and pulled out an envelope and stuck it into the mailbox.

"Jack, what's she-"

"Shhhh."

She gave the house one fleeting glance before she dashed down the porch and back into her car. The old engine roared to life and quickly sputtered away.

Jack and I both rushed across the street. "That was weird." Jack mumbled and I agreed.

We jogged up the steps and Jack reached into the mailbox. "Jack, that car. I know I've seen it somewhere. Maybe it's-

"Mom." Jack butted in.

"Maybe someone from-"

"Abby." Jack said, pushing the envelope in front of me. "The letter. It's from Renee, your mom."


	6. Chapter 6

"Abby!" Jack raised his voice as he waved the letter in front of me.

I looked at him confused. What did he mean _my mother_? What did she want to do with me? My eyes burned hotly as tears as pain and rejection welled up inside of me at the thought of her. She had left me, her stoned and careless ass hadn't gave a second thought about me when she up and left me seven years ago. I could feel the pain of the memory; the realization that it was different that time because she never came back. The emotions flooded me and coursed through my veins. My head was burning with anger and pain while my heart was heavy with rejection and loss.

The rip of paper had me snapping my head at Jack. "What are you doing?'

Jack had slipped his fingers along the underside of the envelope and had one hand pulling out the letter. He looked at me cautiously, "Well don't you want to see what it says?"

Enraged and without thinking I acted on all the pain that my head was trying to wrap itself around. "No!" I shouted and snatched the letter out of his hands, "Why the fuck would I want to read a letter from that piece of shit women. You don't know her Jack. You don't know what she's done!" I waved the letter wildly as tears started to slowly wet my face, "She doesn't want nothing good and that's exactly what the hell will come out of this letter if I read it. I haven't seen her for seven fucking years and I am keeping it that way." I tore my way across the lawn and threw the letter in the trash, slamming the lid shut. "All she wants is drugs, or money, or a favor. That's all she fucking wants…for me to do something to make her god damn happy." I marched my way up the front steps. "And I am not fucking dealing with it." My voice had reached it's peak, as I am sure you could here its rage all the way down the fucking street.

I looked down at Jack from the top of the stairs and narrowed my eyes at his aghast ones. "Jack I am not fucking reading the letter and no one else it either. She's a bitch and she's out of my life. God damnit that's how it's staying. Don't you fucking tell anyone or I swear to God-"

I left the sentence hanging as I realized I was quickly becoming angry at the wrong person. I let the door slam shut behind me and locked myself in my room. I collapsed onto my bed and easily soaked my pillows with my fiery tears.

"**Oh love, you remember how to be a good girl, don't you?" My mother stamped out her cigarette as she blew smoke towards the ceiling. Her free hand had a tender hold under my chin. She was slightly high, but that was okay, she was nicer this way. "Your such a pretty girl." She smiled warmly at me, her eyes a glassy hazel. "Love will you be good today?" I nodded enthusiastically, if it would make her happy then of course I would. "Maybe then tomorrow when you turn eight we can get you a nice present. Would you like that love?" **

**I wasn't sure what answer she wanted. Sometimes when I asked about presents she yelled but now she was asking **_**me **_**about presents, I was confused. I looked to the ground. "A Barbie," I offered timidly.**

**I jumped as an airy laugh escaped her. "Oh, of course love, for you anything" She insisted, slopping a wet kiss on my cheek. "Barbie's and cakes and presents. Lots and lots of presents love."**

**She tugged me close and I could feel something inside of me burst at her affection. I loved when she was like this. Her promises always left me light and carefree as I was always looking forward to a better day tomorrow. Her weight became a little heavier as she slumped more in my arms. I pulled away, her eyelids were droopy and her mouth was an absent 'O' as I pushed her back on the couch. I picked up a glass of water from the kitchen table and dropped in two aspirins. "Mommy." I said softly as I shook her shoulder. "Mommy, water." I shoved the water into her hands and helped her hold it steadily to her lips.**

**There was a knock on the door. I turned to her with wide eyes, was it a man friend of hers? I did not like her friends. Sometimes she would have to fight them because they were mean to her or wanted to share my bed. "Mommy?" I took a worried step towards my room. Should I lock my door? "Your friend?" **

**There was a stronger knock on the door. My mother seemed to wake from her daze as she spastically jumped from her spot on the couch. She ran a loving hand over my head as she moved to the door. I took a few more quick steps towards my room, for extra insurance, unsure of who it was. **

"**Oh! Hello there, we were expecting you!" My mother greeted the women at the door who I immediately recognized as my social worker. "Please, please come in." My mother said ushering her through the door. "You'll have to ignore the mess, me and Abigail were just getting ready to clean up." **

**My mother always said this whenever Mrs. Lisa came. Our house was never clean. There were always clothes scattered throughout, most of which I was unsure of the owner. The kitchen always had half full glasses of water or alcohol- my mother usually passed out before she could finish. Our beds were a mismatch of sheets and blankets that were intertwined in a tangled mess. The bathroom held an array of products, some of which my mother used on her hair and many that concealed drugs. I kept a happy smile though, perhaps this time my mother was telling the truth.**

"**That's quite alright." Mrs. Lisa said, "How are you Abby?" She kneeled in front of me with an honest smile. "Good?"**

**I nodded quickly, put off by her attention and intimate proximity. **

"**Good." She rubbed my arm and stood up. "Shall we tour the house?" **

"**Abby I am so glad to hear that you're happy." Mrs. Lisa had one foot out the door as she spoke her parting words. "Remember, my number is on your fridge if you ever need me." I nodded my head as she waved and pulled the door shut behind her. **

**My mother sighed and fell back onto the couch. "Oh God that was awful. My high wore off half way through it and then I just had to soberly listen to her nagging ass." Her long blonde hair had frizzed from her hands nervously running through them throughout the interview. Her makeup had dulled and lightly smeared but she looked better then normal. I figured this was because she wasn't sky high or wasted drunk. "What a bitch. Always whining about beer cans, and tidiness, and fucking healthy food." I took a deep breath, this was another result of her sobriety, anger.**

**She sighed deeply, as if caring the weight of the world on her shoulders, and closed her eyes. **

"**Mommy?"**

"**Abigail?"**

**I swallowed nervously. "Blonde one instead."**

"**What the fuck are you talking about?"**

**I tried to keep from shutting down as I could hear the hostility sink into her voice. "For my birthday." I found myself once again taking a cautious step towards the safety of my bedroom. The wild cannon that was my mother seemed to explode unannounced when she was sober. "I would like a blonde Barbie, like you."**

**Her eyes snapped open, "Oh child." they were a scratchy red and void of emotion. "I'm not wasting my damn money on your birthday." She stood up. " Don't you think I do a enough for you Abigail? It's like your fucking birthday all god damn year." She walked over to her book case that held everything but a book. "Jesus Christ I fucking whore myself out just to put some food in your god damn mouth." She flipped open an old box and pulled an already rolled joint out and fished a lighter from her pocket. "It's not all about you Abigail."**

**She sat back on the couch and inhaled her lit joint. The familiar sweet smell of weed drifted through the air. I looked at the floor as I slowly realized the pattern that my mother fooled me with every time. She was always so sweet the hours before Mrs. Lisa came. She promised me the world and channeled into my deepest hopes of her love. And every single time I believed her.**

**I dragged my feet towards my room. Four hours later when I was convinced my bladder was going to explode if I held it any longer I wandered to the bathroom. On my way back I pocketed two aspirins and carried a glass of water. My mother was passed out with another lit joint dangling from her hand. I put it out on the couch, not much caring about the singed hole it left. **

**I sat the water and aspirin down. I nudged my mother in the ribs with my foot, "Mom" I dug a little deeper and she didn't respond. I grabbed her by the back of the hair and listened to her breath before setting her face back down. I could feel my face grew hot as I slowly realized how much contempt I had for her. At least when she was sober she wasn't half dead. **

**I grabbed the pills and water and swallowed them myself. Fuck it. The rest of my water soaked through my mom's shirt as I dumped the remaining onto her unconscious figure. I carelessly dropped the glass on the floor watching the crystal shatter like rain. I gave my mom one last fleeting glance. "You're a bitch." I said, not realizing these would be the last words I would say to her for the next eight years. **

**Angel has the biggest fucking mouth in the world. Paris fucking Hilton doesn't have jack shit on him. So naturally, when Angel hears about his baby sister's school fight the first thing he does is tell everyone in the house about it. Worse than a fucking gossiping old bag.**

"**Angel has a big mouth." I complained quickly at Ma's stern look. She ran a hand through my hair as she stood over my bed. "I'd like to just pop him in the damn-"**

"**Baby, I think you've had enough fighting for one day." She sighed softly, poor Ma. Probably was relieved when a little girl showed up on her door step and now I got a three day suspension for fighting. "I understand these things happen but don't you think that lately they've been a little more…frequent?"**

**I opened my mouth to speak but she wasn't looking for an answer. "Abby, I hate to see you do this to yourself because I believe you're better than this. And maybe, if you can't learn to believe the same, than we need to look into some other options."**

**My heart skipped. I sat up in alarm, "Another family?" I choked.**

**Ma's eyes grew wide, "No, no, no. Never, you know that. I love you. What I meant was-" She looked at me wearily, "an after school program or mentoring program."**

"**A stupid babysitter?"**

"**Not a babysitter, more of a supervised guidance program. Some one who can steer you into making better decisions."**

"**A fricking babysitter?" I mean, let's cut the shit, that's really what this was, right? "Who the hell-Did Bobby put you up to this?"**

**I sat up from my bed ready to storm into Bobby's room. Ma laid a hand on my shoulder. "Oh Abby." she sighed, "It's just something to think about. Now I'm sure you've had a long day so why don't you lay back down and I will have someone come get you when supper is ready."**

"**Okay," I agreed but then decided specifications were due, "but not Bobby." He was annoying and lectured too much.**

"**Not Jack either." I didn't want him nagging me about the letter thing.**

"**Probably not Angel," Way too loud and on my shit list, "How about Jerry? Is he eating here?"**

**Ma moved to the door shaking her head. A small smile graced her lips, "No darling, Jerry's out with Camille."**

"**Go figure, what are the chances that the nicest brother moves out first?" I shook my head, for real, whose messed up plan was that? "Alright, well I wasn't that hungry anyways."**

**A disapproving glance shot my way, "How about a surprise?"**

**I shook my head, that wouldn't do. "What about a messenger pigeon, then we could-"**

**Ma pulled the door shut behind her. **


End file.
